I know what’s my problem. I’m tearing between 2 worlds. Two mindsets, two lands, two languages, two physicalities. I'm being stretched, tortured by these polarities. In my apartment I’m home but the outside is strange and scary. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to break this. I want it to snap. I need to exist as 2 separate beings in both places, I cannot stretch myself between the two, the tension is too great. How do I cut the line? And when I cut it, how do I live so that I hang on to both mes? Do I set aside an increment of time? “Ok, for this half hour I’m in Wisconsin. For this half-hour I’m in Minnesota. For the next 36 hours I’m in Kambara.”
I think I just make the most out of every moment, realizing that I do exist in 2 places. There are going to be unique and crazy thoughts because of this. I’m going to find myself in places I never imagined. I should commit my mind to whatever task is before me, in whatever spectrum it may be. Make a decision, and enjoy being in the place where it brings me.
Choose responsibility.
Make a decision.
Do not waste any time wallowing.
Live cleanly.
Absorb your surroundings as you enjoy them candidly, and then know that you are a part of it.
Realize that people surround you everywhere.
A smile reaches across all cultures.
1 comment:
Maybe you could think about it like God is everywhere and his purpose is directing you so it's not really too alien and he's backing you where ever you go. And since his love is greater than any of your friends and greater than any fear you've got, life's more awesome than you might realize. yeah. i miss you! i remember the one time i came back to visit in eau claire and i gave you a big hug and i just wish i could still do that:)
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