Spring Break Period of Life
Clam Digging
My Parents' Visit
With my parents in Nara and Kyoto
With my parents in Nara and Kyoto 2
Parents around Shizuoka and Tokyo
Last days with the parents
More pictures from this spring
Leaver's Party pictures
Monday, July 21, 2008
Friday, July 18, 2008
Writings on the Ocean
The humidity does many things in summertime Japan. Some are destructive – I have already lost 2 shelves, a necklace and a pair of shorts to mold, and who knows what else I’ll lose. I have my dehumidifier running in my closet right now. It also keeps me in a nice shiny glaze and soaks my sheets at night. I have to run the fan to dry my bed during the day.
The humidity does some very beautiful things though too. Like when I’m biking to school and look up into the hills to find their tops erased by clouds, smudged out against the white sky. The ocean too seems to be born out of the mist, its giant waves generated just out of sight before being sent to shore. Standing on the beach tonight I could see it all in perfect moonlight, the humidity having settled down above the water. The man on the moon was singing his high sad note and the melody played along the moonbeams before being turned to pure liquid on the waves. The waves tonight came silently and didn’t sound until they beat upon the wavebreakers. I felt no bigger than a pebble tonight, standing there peering over them. The waves were just the right size so I could imagine myself standing at the edge of a lake looking up at the water lapping on shore. I wondered what kind of a sound those waves make to tiny ears.
I cannot forget you ocean, and I cannot look away. You’re magic- you don’t exist and you spread everywhere, beyond what my mind can fathom. I think I could lust after you, I would have run away to you if this were a different century. Ocean, take my thoughts and sail them over your belly; scatter my dreams and gather them on your other side. Hold me shallow and take me deep, deep to where my darkest unspoken fears lie sovereign and language knows no words.
.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
hmm
How quickly novelty wears off. You know, some things are only cool because they’re new. You put up with them, no, you enjoy them and appreciate them because they’re new. But when that is the sole quality on which they stand, they will inevitably crumble. Time in its sure march renders them ridiculous and intolerable. A love based on novelty is doomed to fail.
I’ve fallen out of love with obento.
.
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Read the post before this one first
Woah - I just watched a video of Phil Wickham's song True Love on GodTube. It's a really great song and I'm about to go download it as soon as I type in here. It made me realize that I forgot the reason why I even began to write my last post. I originally had wanted to comment on Dawkins' last statement in the God vs. Science debate. Here it is:
"My mind is open to the most wonderful range of future possibilities, which I cannot even dream about, nor can you, nor can anybody else. What I am skeptical about is the idea that whatever wonderful revelation does come in the science of the future, it will turn out to be one of the particular historical religions that people happen to have dreamed up. When we started out and we were talking about the origins of the universe and the physical constants, I provided what I thought were cogent arguments against a supernatural intelligent designer. But it does seem to me to be a worthy idea. Refutable--but nevertheless grand and big enough to be worthy of respect. I don't see the Olympian gods or Jesus coming down and dying on the Cross as worthy of that grandeur. They strike me as parochial. If there is a God, it's going to be a whole lot bigger and a whole lot more incomprehensible than anything that any theologian of any religion has ever proposed."
As a Christian, I do believe that God is so much bigger than what any theologian or human being can propose. Most of the time our words and actions as Christians do the exact opposite of showing who God is, much less so even coming close to giving an accurate portrayal of just who the creator is. Words fail when it comes to God. Human argument falls flat. Analogies are insufficient. Our understanding is left wanting. Yes, God is incomprehensible. The Answer is more than we will ever be able to describe, more than we will ever know, more than we will ever realize. My only hope lies in the everlasting, all-encompassing, always active Creator and His Son and His Holy Spirit to reach the lives of my friends and the people I know, to direct the message of salvation and hope into each of their lives.
Job 36:29
Isaiah 40:13
Romans 11:34
I Corinthians 2:16
How awesome and incredible is that?
.
"My mind is open to the most wonderful range of future possibilities, which I cannot even dream about, nor can you, nor can anybody else. What I am skeptical about is the idea that whatever wonderful revelation does come in the science of the future, it will turn out to be one of the particular historical religions that people happen to have dreamed up. When we started out and we were talking about the origins of the universe and the physical constants, I provided what I thought were cogent arguments against a supernatural intelligent designer. But it does seem to me to be a worthy idea. Refutable--but nevertheless grand and big enough to be worthy of respect. I don't see the Olympian gods or Jesus coming down and dying on the Cross as worthy of that grandeur. They strike me as parochial. If there is a God, it's going to be a whole lot bigger and a whole lot more incomprehensible than anything that any theologian of any religion has ever proposed."
As a Christian, I do believe that God is so much bigger than what any theologian or human being can propose. Most of the time our words and actions as Christians do the exact opposite of showing who God is, much less so even coming close to giving an accurate portrayal of just who the creator is. Words fail when it comes to God. Human argument falls flat. Analogies are insufficient. Our understanding is left wanting. Yes, God is incomprehensible. The Answer is more than we will ever be able to describe, more than we will ever know, more than we will ever realize. My only hope lies in the everlasting, all-encompassing, always active Creator and His Son and His Holy Spirit to reach the lives of my friends and the people I know, to direct the message of salvation and hope into each of their lives.
Job 36:29
Isaiah 40:13
Romans 11:34
I Corinthians 2:16
How awesome and incredible is that?
.
Musings
I just read a great article published as a cover story by Time Magazine in November 2006. It's titled "God vs. Science" and can be found here. This article is a debate between pre-eminent atheist Richard Dawkins and the Christian and lead scientist of the Human Genome Project, Francis Collins. Many of the core issues in the God vs. Science debate are identified very truthfully and simply in this article. Francis Collins said a few of the same things that I wrote down in reaction to Dawkins' book The God Delusion, though his words are much more rehearsed and efficient and solidified than mine. In particular I liked Collins' statement about how we should approach the argument:
"God's existence is either true or not. But calling it a scientific question implies that the tools of science can provide the answer. From my perspective, God cannot be completely contained within nature, and therefore God's existence is outside of science's ability to really weigh in."
Collins is not saying here that science must stay out of religion or that the two are separate entities contained in airtight boxes (to quote Steven Jay Gould). You should read the article for exact clarification, but essentially what Collins is doing with this statement is reacting to Dawkins' approach to proving, or disproving God. Dawkins assumes all that exists is the physical realm, and using only the physical realm we can't see or find or prove God, so therefore he doesn't exist. I agree that you can't prove God using the physical realm alone. Somewhat in this article but also in his book The Language of God, Collins says that it is "the knowledge of the Moral Law and the universal search for God" among other uniquely human attributes that are the things that show God's existence. Collins says that when we look at science we're discovering just one of the ways that God operates in his vast creation. This too shows the paradigm difference that I tried explaining in my notes on TGD. Dawkins is working backwards through time and level of creation and Collins is working forwards.
Here's 3 further comments on this topic:
I have been a creationist for many years now, and that conclusion is not founded upon a vast understanding of science. I am open to the possibility of accepting evolution as the process of history. If all the evidence really points in that direction, then I have to choose to be ignorant and bull-headed to continue to believe in creationism. And I would also be doing it without cause. For if fundamental theology and the fundamentals of Jesus life, death, resurrection, and salvation are all consistent with evolution, then why reject it?
Having said that, there are a couple of things I am uncomfortable with about evolution. First is the fact that, if evolution is true, then death was rampant in the world before Adam. (This line of thinking came to me through the author of In the Beginning, Walt Brown). Now Paul writes in Romans 5 that death came through the sin of the first man. Sin causes death. If evolution is true, then it really complicates how we view the roll of sin. One argument is that God took a particular being at a point in the long history of this earth and called it Adam and breathed his image into this being (thus making a soul) and set it apart from all the other beings. This being was sinless and had perfect union with its creator and when it decided to not do what its creator wanted it to do sin entered the world. It is possible to reconcile this theory with Genesis 1 but not with Genesis 2 and certainly not with sin creating death. Genesis 2 makes it seem as though Adam was there near the beginning of creation, before rain and before plants were growing outside of the Garden of Eden. Is Genesis suddenly being uber-poetic here? There's another book I need to read by C. John Collins (not a relation) titled Science & Faith.
The second thing is found in Collins' last comment posted above. I disagree with what he says here. In a round-about way it is true that free will is related to why God seems hard to find, but only in the view of sin - not in some God-initiated way as Collins seems to suggest.
I believe that God desperately wants us to find him, to know that he exists, to reach out for him, to worship him, to glorify him and to honor him with our actions. Of course there is also free will. Free will allowed the possibility for sin, and it is sin that clouds our view and keeps us from seeing our ever-present creator. God didn't create with the intention to keep himself hidden so that we would have to accept him on faith. Fundamental Christian Theology states that God created us perfect and that we sinned and separated ourselves from Him and clouded our own view. As human beings we see good and bad and we realize that we are living in an imperfect condition. We constantly fight against the razor-edged chains in our life that are destroying us - addictions, hurtful words and actions, loss, and countless others. These things are the result of our transgressions against our creator. We struggle with these things, and I'm telling you the only sure-fire way to conquer them is to lay the burden of the fight on the one who can win - to let go, to trust that he will succeed, to stop struggling and believe that he will carry the day. This is called faith.
This is where I'll end now for tonight. This is a new revelation for me about faith. I think I've come across a new way of looking at faith and looking at coming to Jesus. I need more time to flesh this out and put it in identifiable and comprehensible words. I'd also like to spend considerably more time thinking and writing about Adam's role if evolution is indeed our history.
.
"God's existence is either true or not. But calling it a scientific question implies that the tools of science can provide the answer. From my perspective, God cannot be completely contained within nature, and therefore God's existence is outside of science's ability to really weigh in."
Collins is not saying here that science must stay out of religion or that the two are separate entities contained in airtight boxes (to quote Steven Jay Gould). You should read the article for exact clarification, but essentially what Collins is doing with this statement is reacting to Dawkins' approach to proving, or disproving God. Dawkins assumes all that exists is the physical realm, and using only the physical realm we can't see or find or prove God, so therefore he doesn't exist. I agree that you can't prove God using the physical realm alone. Somewhat in this article but also in his book The Language of God, Collins says that it is "the knowledge of the Moral Law and the universal search for God" among other uniquely human attributes that are the things that show God's existence. Collins says that when we look at science we're discovering just one of the ways that God operates in his vast creation. This too shows the paradigm difference that I tried explaining in my notes on TGD. Dawkins is working backwards through time and level of creation and Collins is working forwards.
Here's 3 further comments on this topic:
COLLINS: By being outside of nature, God is also outside of space and time. Hence, at the moment of the creation of the universe, God could also have activated evolution, with full knowledge of how it would turn out, perhaps even including our having this conversation. The idea that he could both foresee the future and also give us spirit and free will to carry out our own desires becomes entirely acceptable.
DAWKINS: I think that's a tremendous cop-out. If God wanted to create life and create humans, it would be slightly odd that he should choose the extraordinarily roundabout way of waiting for 10 billion years before life got started and then waiting for another 4 billion years until you got human beings capable of worshipping and sinning and all the other things religious people are interested in.
COLLINS: Who are we to say that that was an odd way to do it? I don't think that it is God's purpose to make his intention absolutely obvious to us. If it suits him to be a deity that we must seek without being forced to, would it not have been sensible for him to use the mechanism of evolution without posting obvious road signs to reveal his role in creation?
I have been a creationist for many years now, and that conclusion is not founded upon a vast understanding of science. I am open to the possibility of accepting evolution as the process of history. If all the evidence really points in that direction, then I have to choose to be ignorant and bull-headed to continue to believe in creationism. And I would also be doing it without cause. For if fundamental theology and the fundamentals of Jesus life, death, resurrection, and salvation are all consistent with evolution, then why reject it?
Having said that, there are a couple of things I am uncomfortable with about evolution. First is the fact that, if evolution is true, then death was rampant in the world before Adam. (This line of thinking came to me through the author of In the Beginning, Walt Brown). Now Paul writes in Romans 5 that death came through the sin of the first man. Sin causes death. If evolution is true, then it really complicates how we view the roll of sin. One argument is that God took a particular being at a point in the long history of this earth and called it Adam and breathed his image into this being (thus making a soul) and set it apart from all the other beings. This being was sinless and had perfect union with its creator and when it decided to not do what its creator wanted it to do sin entered the world. It is possible to reconcile this theory with Genesis 1 but not with Genesis 2 and certainly not with sin creating death. Genesis 2 makes it seem as though Adam was there near the beginning of creation, before rain and before plants were growing outside of the Garden of Eden. Is Genesis suddenly being uber-poetic here? There's another book I need to read by C. John Collins (not a relation) titled Science & Faith.
The second thing is found in Collins' last comment posted above. I disagree with what he says here. In a round-about way it is true that free will is related to why God seems hard to find, but only in the view of sin - not in some God-initiated way as Collins seems to suggest.
I believe that God desperately wants us to find him, to know that he exists, to reach out for him, to worship him, to glorify him and to honor him with our actions. Of course there is also free will. Free will allowed the possibility for sin, and it is sin that clouds our view and keeps us from seeing our ever-present creator. God didn't create with the intention to keep himself hidden so that we would have to accept him on faith. Fundamental Christian Theology states that God created us perfect and that we sinned and separated ourselves from Him and clouded our own view. As human beings we see good and bad and we realize that we are living in an imperfect condition. We constantly fight against the razor-edged chains in our life that are destroying us - addictions, hurtful words and actions, loss, and countless others. These things are the result of our transgressions against our creator. We struggle with these things, and I'm telling you the only sure-fire way to conquer them is to lay the burden of the fight on the one who can win - to let go, to trust that he will succeed, to stop struggling and believe that he will carry the day. This is called faith.
This is where I'll end now for tonight. This is a new revelation for me about faith. I think I've come across a new way of looking at faith and looking at coming to Jesus. I need more time to flesh this out and put it in identifiable and comprehensible words. I'd also like to spend considerably more time thinking and writing about Adam's role if evolution is indeed our history.
.
Sunday, July 6, 2008
Haro? Me no supeki Ingurish.
I need to destroy the internet. It sews me onto a world I don't belong to anymore. And then when I shut my computer, and turn my eyes away, I have to physically rip my soul from the pictures, the chats and the life I build for myself there during the brief moments I imbibe. It hurts. And I bleed.
So I've decided to destroy the internet. All of it. I will chew one cable at a time, break one fiber-optic, snap one wire, disable one satellite in my quest for total darkness. Sorry if you liked the internet. But that's the way it's going to be.
Reality exists in 1 place at a time only. Only God can leap from one place to the next.
I need omnipresence. That would be helpful.
I think I'm going to go offline for awhile. I'm going to erase my English databank in every moment that I don't need to speak it for official work hours where I'm getting paid. I'm telling everyone from now on that I'm from Norway and I don't speak any English. Thanks for the idea, Pat.
.
This blog was interrupted by this chat with Pat:
Pat
So I've decided to destroy the internet. All of it. I will chew one cable at a time, break one fiber-optic, snap one wire, disable one satellite in my quest for total darkness. Sorry if you liked the internet. But that's the way it's going to be.
Reality exists in 1 place at a time only. Only God can leap from one place to the next.
I need omnipresence. That would be helpful.
I think I'm going to go offline for awhile. I'm going to erase my English databank in every moment that I don't need to speak it for official work hours where I'm getting paid. I'm telling everyone from now on that I'm from Norway and I don't speak any English. Thanks for the idea, Pat.
.
This blog was interrupted by this chat with Pat:
Pat
Hey Luther
How's life
2:35amLuther
hello?
2:35amPat
How are you man
2:35amLuther
ok
up and down
yeah
it's crazy
2:35amPat
You're still in Japan right?
2:35amLuther
life's crazy
yeah
2:36amPat
Thats good
2:37amLuther
or good that I'm in Japan?
are you there?
2:38amPat
Both I think
Sorry I'm in Honduras right now teaching English and I have a ton to do at the same time
2:38amLuther
ah
Honduras
How many classes do you teach ina week?
2:38amPat
Yeah its awesome
4 middle school classes everyday
2:39amLuther
Pat is no longer online. The following was not sent:
wow, crazy
how many lesson plans per week is that?
2:40amPat is online.
2:40amPat
But its good man.
Only 1
2:40amLuther
at least that's good
what do you do with your free time?
2:41amPat
I pretty much teach the same thing to each class. Which can get tedious for me but I've learned some REALLY awesome English-Learning songs
2:44amPat
How about you?
2:46amLuther
ah - I don't know
I dont' know what's happening
2:46amPat
Really?
2:46amLuther
I kind of just swim through space for a few hours
then I'm back at school
2:46amPat
Nice
How's your japonese?
2:47amLuther
I'm blinded, reminded, I reflect, reject...
I dont' know what I'm doing here
sometimes I freak out
other times I think I could stay forever
2:48amPat
I honestly think that is pretty normal for anyone living abroad
2:48amLuther
I'm approaching 1 year, Pat
2:48amPat
Yeah!!
2:48amLuther
3 1/2 weeks shy of 1 year
2:49amPat
I can't imagine that. Ive done a 5 month stint and now am on a 2 month one, and I still really struggle
2:49amLuther
Yeah, I've done 2 5 month stints
in a row
My Japanese is crap
I'm trying
and I'm learning
but slowly
Everyone always demands English out of me all the time
even in my private, after school life
2:50amPat
Yeah I know how that is
2:50amLuther
"will you speak English with my son?"
"will you volunteer at this English conversation class?"
2:50amPat
I eventually started telling people I was german.
2:50amLuther
"will you give me private lessons?"
"NO!
"
WE'RE IN FRICKIN JAPAN!!!
when do I get to learn how to live here?
Even when I say, in perfect Japanese, "mou skoshi yukuri kantan ni itte kudasai masenka"
they freakin start talking in English
no
don't speak English
just use simple Japanese
I speak simple English
I'm kind to you
I pick out words I know you understand
just scale it back a bit
don't speak English
I want to learn
Yeah, I'm wiggin out right now
sorry
2:53amPat
No that's ok
I know what its like to need to vent man
2:54amLuther
You know what my prospects are of meeting a nice, English speaking, Christian girl out here?
2:54amPat
Probably about as good as the brewers winning the world series
2:54amLuther
the answer is zero
I might have well as signed up to be a catholic priest
2:56amLuther
each time I sign another 1 year contract, I'm saying that I'm quite interested in extending the age that I get married by 1 more year
Saturday, July 5, 2008
The okonomiyaki place
I have a story to tell you, and it couldn’t be better if I made it up. Really, I couldn’t script this stuff. Some things that happen here in Japan are simply uncanny, the sequence of events twisting themselves in curly-Qs, leading me somewhere in a moment and then to some other place in the next. I usually don’t know where I’ll end up and often don’t even know where I am at the present. So I will tell you now, after the raging fires of experience have died down to recordable levels yet before the coals of memory fade to ash.
I set out this past Friday night for my friends’, the Sano-sans, ramen-shop restaurant for a meal and a beer. I went on foot since I knew that I would have a drink and even biking after consuming one beer is illegal. It’s about a 20 minute walk, but I’m used to walking and used to travel taking more than a bit of time. When I arrived at their shop in Yui I discovered it was closed. This was strange since it was a Friday. I hadn’t seen them since my parents left, so I was looking forward to spending some time with them that night. At this point I was already pretty hungry and didn’t want to wait another 20 minutes and then have to cook dinner. Luckily, the tiny okonomiyaki restaurant (think pancakes, slightly raw on the inside, filled with lettuce and ham, then topped with a type of barbeque sauce and mayonnaise) across the street was open so I didn’t have far to go. I had never been even though I like okonomiyaki. The Sano-san’s “Porushe” was right there so anytime I was in the area to eat I would stop at their place. Being closed, I was now free to guiltlessly try a new place.
I hopped across the road, ducked under the half curtain and slid the door open. The next step left me speechless. Standing inside the entranceway I found myself simultaneously standing in the middle of the shop, at the end of the counter and in the “group” section. It was tiny. It was tinier than tiny. It’s places like this from where we get the expression “hole in the wall.” It had about the same floor space as a 5-man tent. I found myself facing the shop server (owner? Tenant?) behind the counter and two patrons gaping wide eyed at the pale white ghost who had just floated into their world. After another moments worth of hesitation there were konbanwas (good evenings) all around and the server (I later found out her name was Mi-chan) motioned for me to sit in the only other available seat, squeezed right between the two already eating. This was a little embarrassing as I felt I was breaking up a party, or at the very least moving into the middle of what had been until that point a very uneventful and pleasant evening for everyone. (A party with 3 people, but really they filled the place up.)
I sat there for awhile as the three continued to talk. Mi-chan brought me tsukemono and asked what I wanted to drink. I sat quietly trying to absorb what exactly was happening. The counter was tall and covered with alcohol advertisements and various kinds of ashtrays. The wall behind the counter was covered with shelves and more liquor ads. Mi-chan was busying herself between chatting and cooking up hearts and liver for the man sitting on my right. On the other side of him was a large TV screen glowing blue. Above me and in the corner to my left were two more TVs and behind me was a fourth. This was a karaoke bar.
Now I’ve frequented enough karaoke bars to get the gist for the technology, and this okonomiyaki place topped the list. There were brand-new looking mics, and two handheld electronic boxes that you could search for and enter the title of the song you wanted to sing. As I was eying this, the woman to my left picked one op and selected a song. When the music started I said, “Oh, enka.” And she responded with the specific kind of enka. They asked me if I knew any of the music, and I said no. Then they asked me how long I’d been here and I said 11 months and they were like, “That’s not long enough to learn this music.”
She had a nice voice and the song was enjoyable. I noticed up in the right hand corner of the screen that there was the silhouette of a woman lounging back inside of a pink box. I really couldn’t guess why that was there, but I didn’t have long to come up with an answer before it was revealed to me in its full glory. When the song ended a saxophone let out a provocative call and a Japanese model appeared fully clothed. Then the screen was covered in tiles and a title in Japanese appeared stating, “Your point total is…”
The numbers started spinning, and as they rose the tiles fell away from the screen slowly uncovering a now uncovered girl. The score reached 94 – 3 tiles away from the full monty. “zannen…” the guy to my right said. He shook his head and looked down at his food disappointed.
I couldn’t believe it. It was more the non-chalance that surprised me. The guy picked up the mic for a song this time and also sang an enka classic. Just as before, we watched the numbers spin and the tiles fall, still not achieving a perfect score. I asked if it had any English songs and they weren’t sure. I figured maybe they at least had some Beatles, so I started searching the machine. Sure enough, they had thousands of English songs, probably tens of thousands. I even found Jack Johnson and Hootie and the Blowfish. My first choice was the Neil Diamond classic “Sweet Caroline.” It’s karaoke perfect. I sang it pretty well – I think a 97, but still not good enough to be completely revealing. The others were satisfied with my singing though, and went on chatting a picking out more enka titles.
I had really come for a meal, so now I ordered the standard okonomiyaki. It came filled with cabbage and other unidentifiable things as well as a pile of sliced red ginger on the side. I had asked for low mayo, but there was still a sufficient amount to fill a small jar. Mayo is a staple over here. About this time we get to chatting some more and they were asking me questions about where I was from and what I was doing in Japan. Thinking about it afterward I’m quite surprised these questions didn’t come earlier. Besides the initial contact where both sides were quite surprised to see each other, they had carried on like I was a regular there, encouraging me to sing and going about their routine evening.
True to Japanese first conversations my age was asked. Mi-chan was delighted to hear “24” and went to get her cell phone. She dialed a number and began talking. While she was on the phone she explained to me that she was talking to “Maiko,” a 24-year old hair stylist living in Kambara. Maiko couldn’t come over at that moment, so Mi-chan handed me the phone to be introduced. Now the evening was becoming quite amusing. I exchanged a few lines with the girl, essentially just saying hi and nice to meet you, and handed the phone back to Mi-chan. She told me I needed to come back the following night to meet this girl, but I said I was already going to a friend’s house for a Mexican food party. She told me to come back the next weekend.
The night ebbed on and soon one, then the other patron left the place. I was still finishing my second beer, but it looked like Mi-chan was wanting to close down shop. She handed me a bill for 2500 yen, about 25 bucks. I thought that was a little steep for 2 beers and a plate of greasy, hole-in-the-wall okonomiyaki, but then maybe I was paying for the karaoke too. I drained my beer, paid the bill, slid the door open and stepped out into the night. I really hadn’t absorbed any of this at that moment. I focused my eyes and took the first step towards home.
.
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